Party In The U.S.A.

   

An Assessment of Miley Cyrus's Performance at the VMAs

by E.J. Kruser

  Miley Cyrus. Adorable child star gone ratchet or an inspiration to all of us? For those of you who don’t care enough to stay in the Hollywood social media loop, first of all, good for you, and second, OMG I can’t believe you haven’t been watching and waiting for stars to make embarrassing mistakes so you can talk about that instead of worrying about your own insecurities and cosmetic flaws! By the way, you-know-who, yes, we did notice your fake tan, and no, it’s not as unnaturally preposterous as Snooki from the Jersey Shore. Congrats! While we’re doling out kudos, let’s mention our appreciation for the unveiling of Miley Cyrus’s newest music video for her new hit single “Wrecking Ball.” Congratulations, Miley! It takes a lot of courage to release such a depthless erotic video onto the world-wide web, especially proceeding the backlash and insatiable buzz following the controversial VMA performance with Robin Thicke and giant teddy bear strippers.

   For those of you who haven’t viewed the viral video of Ms. Cyrus twerking, gyrating, and sexualizing inanimate objects, I cannot, in good conscience, recommend doing so, as all of my previously fond recollections of the young sensation carrying on with her goofily innocent antics and switching between outfits so her date wouldn’t find out that she’s actually Hannah Montana have been tainted and voided of all value in my memory for life. R.I.P. My fond memories. R.I.P American morality and decency.

“It’s nice that Miley’s comfortable with herself.” Tweets esteemed funnyman Judd Apatow.

  While it is nice that the singer/songwriter/actor has found her confidence, the performance was less than pleasant for the majority of Americans viewing it. One Youtube video alone has over 3 million views with a 4:1 ratio of thumbs down to thumbs up. It would appear America disapproves. But who is America to judge? Consider this scenario: a teenage boy has a “crush” on a girl in his school, but he lacks the confidence to ask her out because of his low social status in the community and high score of 82,690 in Minecraft, which is getting higher daily. One day, the boy decides to put himself out there and ask his crush out on a date to The Olive Garden on Dodge Street in Dubuque, now offering the Never Ending Pasta Bowl™ for just $9.99! The young lady turns him down and is disgusted with the video game habits he takes so much pride in. Miley Cyrus is that poor, acne-ridden boy. She put herself out there and was shot down on a much larger scale. Surely he was devastated and lived a depressing hermit lifestyle until his final lonely days. Surely America feels compassion for this poor soul, but why then does America react with such animosity to a person like Miley in a near parallel situation? Ms. Cyrus doesn’t let it get to her.

"They're overthinking it … You're thinking about it more than I thought about it when I did it. Like, I didn't even think about it 'cause that's just me." Ms. Cyrus is quoted in an interview following the media’s uproar over her VMA performance of “We Can’t Stop”/”Blurred Lines.”

  Perhaps, we should praise Miley’s spirit rather than ridiculing her risque attire and unnecessarily sexualized social media. Miley is a strong, brave young woman who is able to admit fault. "I have so many...issues," Cyrus tells a reporter while discussing the public’s reaction to her performance. "I don't have a normal life … I take a hiatus every now and again, but I'm not good at that." We need to look deep within our hearts and find some empathy for this filthy-rich 20-year-old pop sensation. She’s just trying to find herself and having fun doing it. The moral of the story is this: Open judgement is cruel and stymieing. We need to be unafraid of this inevitable judgement, as Ms. Cyrus exemplifies, and just do whatever we want for our own personal pleasure. Over the weekend, this reporter put this philosophy into action. I put my hands up; they were playing my song. The butterflies flew away. I said, “Hey! It’s a party in the USA!” And you all know what that means. Freedom. And do you know what that means? E’r’body gettin’ ther’ twerk on without regret and criticism. Because this is America. And our parties compete with each other to form a more perfect union.