Guest Opinion: You’re Literally Speaking Incorrectly

by Jake Klein

There is an epidemic that has plagued our nation. People all across America have been speaking incorrectly. They have been using the word “literally” incorrectly or unnecessarily in their everyday speaking. The incorrect use of this word is like a social trend: it came out of nowhere, and now it seems everyone is doing it.

I am what most would call a grammar Nazi. Because of this, I’m going to give you a quick crash course on how to use this word correctly so that many years from now you won’t say to your college English professor, “I literally did my homework last night.”

“Literally” can be used in three different ways. The first is in translations of foreign languages. With translations, literally means ‘word-for-word’. For example, someone may ask, “How do you say ‘My name is’ in French?” To which you could reply, “Je m’appelle, which literally translates to ‘I call myself,’ but basically means ‘My name is’.”

The second use is with exaggeration. You may say to your friend, “I called you a thousand times last night! Why didn’t you answer?” Now, you most likely did not call him 1,000 times, but you were exaggerating. However, if you actually did call him one thousand times, you could say, “I literally called you a thousand times last night!” 

The third use of the word is with commonly said expressions. For example, “raining cats and dogs” is an expression meaning it is raining a lot. But if for some strange reason, cats and dogs are falling from the sky, you could correctly say, “It’s literally raining cats and dogs!” A more realistic example is the expression “it blew me away,” meaning it was very impressive or surprising. “The scientist’s project blew me away!” If the scientist’s project was demonstrating a giant fan that physically pushed you across the room, you could humorously say, “The scientist’s project literally blew me away!”

Here are some words/phrases that can be used instead of the word literally: seriously, honestly, honest to goodness, totally, not-even-kidding, and really. 

So what did we learn today? The word “literally” can be used only

1. When explaining a translation word-for-word.
2. When the rest of your 100% honest sentence may be taken as exaggeration (called you a thousand times), or as an expression (blew me away).
3. When using a differentiating between a common expression like figures of speech and real situations 

So many people today are using this word incorrectly that the correct definition and use of the word, sadly, is dying. Sound smart, be smart, speak correctly, and the world will be a better place, literally. 

Want more info on the correct use of the English language? Watch Weird Al Yankovic’s “Word Crimes,” a parody of “Blurred Lines,” on YouTube.